snow day

The spring Isaac turned 10 he got a new bike. He was very excited to ride it to school on Friday. But Thursday night we had one of our famous late spring snow storms. Aaron shoveled our walks and driveway before early-morning seminary, but the rest of the neighborhood was covered in 6”. Isaac was devastated when we told him he couldn’t ride his bike to school that morning. We became the enemy and had to endure the rantings of a very frustrated and disappointed 10-year-old that escalated as departure time drew nearer. Then I offered a suggestion: we could let him ride to the corner and if HE felt like he could get all the way to school without too much trouble, he could go on; but if the going was too rough, he could come home for a ride in the car. That was agreeable to all parties and he took off. I watched from the window as he went along fine until he hit the neighbor’s walk and immediately went down. He picked himself up, turned around and rode home. He came into the house and calmly announced, “I’d better ride in the car.” He realized that we weren’t the enemy, it was just the reality of the situation that gave him no other choice. I told him how sorry I was and that I understood his disappointment. I did not give him an “I told you so” or “See why I’m the Mom” or “You should have listened to me.” (Sparing him some of my own importance?!?) Consequently there was no resentment on his part, and, having come to the decision on his own, no feeling of, “I wanted to ride my bike but my mean parents wouldn’t let me.”

Although we often know more than our children, sometimes it is important to let them come to their own understanding about things. Then our role as parents becomes to be patient and compassionate, especially when “understanding” the truth about things is painful…